The March of Madness

This month has been a roller coaster. When I reflect over the past three years, I realized that some pivotal life changes happened in March. 

Feel free to join me down memory lane. I’m going to share the event, the original meaning I gave it, and the new meaning I’m giving it to move me forward.

March of 2020- Covid started. Living in NY, Covid shut down my whole world. There was a lot of discomfort, anxiety, and adjusting. I thought Covid was the “universe’s way to keep me a hermit”. My new meaning of the Covid is that I am an overcomer. Even during uncertain times, I was posting on my Youtube channel. Thanks to Covid, I actually have YouTube videos online. 

March of 2021- I let circumstances dictate my choices. I chose anger to communicate my needs. In the wake of my anger, I hurt someone I love very much and pushed them away. I let that mean that I was a monster unworthy of love. Today, I see that moment as a reminder that I communicate my needs in love. Love is stronger than anger. My relationship with that person is healing and mending. 

March of 2022- I would have potentially given birth to my first child. The reason I did not is because I chose on June 16, 2021 to have an abortion. My secret is out. The support group I am in is called Divine Timing Ministries. It is a support group for post abortion women to heal and grow. I let my abortion mean that I was a murderer, heartless, and unworthy of being a mother. I believed that since I knew better, I didn’t deserve to feel anything about my abortion. What I choose today what my abortion means is that God (being all loving and good) can use ALL THINGS (and I mean all things) for His glory and good for those who love God. Romans 8:28. I believe with all my heart that God is a God of healing. My abortion was the pivotal shift I needed to come back to my Heavenly Father. I felt much like the prodigal son as I ran back to my forgiving, loving, and generous God.

March of 2023- I felt everything. For awhile, I have been numb to the connection of my body and my emotions. I knew that there was a connection between them, but I didn’t understand the gravity of that until this month. This month, this year, I physically felt awful. I wasn’t even sick. I had more headaches, felt sluggish, and just wanted to give up. At first I thought that meant all my hard work up until this point was meaningless. After working with my life coach and my wealth activation coach, I realize the meaning of this month is actually just that there is a season for everything. 

I’m really proud of myself for not giving up and catching myself before throwing all my work out the window. Just because things are not going the way I think they “should”, doesn’t negate the value of reality. 

I know the basketball season of March is called March Madness. I enjoy the sport of basketball. You don’t want to watch a predictable game. The madness is in the excitement of not knowing which team is going to win because both are playing with their hearts on the court.

I don’t need to predict the outcome of my life. I trust that Jesus has a purpose and plan for me. Even in the madness, I can commit my heart fully to His plan. I’m playing the game. I’m on a mission to bring God’s kingdom to earth just like how He tells us to pray. 

I hope the month of March brought you good things. Thank you for reading. Blessings to you.