Now you
probably read this title and think, “Come on, Christa, do you really have to
relate everything back to business?” And my response would be “As a matter of
fact, I do!” Only sometimes, though.
The lesson
today has to do with fiat love vs commodity love. You may know these terms to
describe money. Usually, they are. In case you are not up-to-date on your economic
terminology, fiat money is what the U.S. dollar is. Its worth is only backed
up by the government saying it is valuable. Commodity money is money that is
backed up by something else that is valuable such as gold or diamonds. You’re probably
thinking, “ok, Christa, but you used those words in connection to love instead
of money. What are you getting at?” Great question! Glad you asked! Let me shed
some light on the subject. (pull light bulb switch)
I use the
word love flippantly. Love, just like our U.S. dollar, is valued because a
higher authority told us it is important, whether that higher authority is God or
society. But what really backs up the word love when we use it? I can tell
someone repeatedly that I love them, but does that word really mean anything if
I never see, talk to, or acknowledge that person? Now under certain circumstances,
it is harder to see people you love a whole lot. Sometimes it is even hard to
make time to talk to them. But let’s be real, if you don’t actually acknowledge
that person, it is probably difficult for someone to believe you love them. I
love my relatives, but I do not always see or talk to them, but I acknowledge I
have them and that they are important to me.
I believe
the saying, “actions speak louder than words.” Here’s where commodity love
comes to play. Love without action is worthless. Love is merely a word that
means a lot of different things. When you use the word love towards another
human being, you better be ready to back it up with some action.
I was in a relationship where I
thought we were in love like I mentioned before, but when push came to shove,
his love for me was fiat. He knew that society deemed it important to “love”
your girlfriend, but when I needed him the most his love had no more value than
an unsigned blank check.
A marriage couldn’t last on words
alone. If a wife tells her husband every day that she loves him, but never wants
to spend any time with him, how can he feel like she loves him? A husband can
say he loves his wife every day, but if he is never there to share in the work
of having a household or being there for her when things are hard, how can she
believe he loves her?
People say they can fall out of
love, but I think it is more like we get lazy because we do not want to back up
our use of love with something more valuable. Every person has a different way
to feel love. I truly believe love has to be proven. It is not good enough to
just say “I love you.” It isn’t morally right to use “you love me” to get
people to do things for you. There is a happy medium. Love should be a positive
expression not a manipulation.
I know my parents love me even if
they could never say it with words. I know my sister loves me without her even
having to tell me. It is still wonderful to hear that they love me, but if that
word was taken away, their actions would scream of affections towards me that I
am drenched in. I am overwhelming loved by my parents, my sister, and my best
friends. They never have to tell me, but when they do, I know with all my heart
it is true.
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